There I was just having my mind in pain as usual ...

Early this year, one of my most fervent wishes was to see her one last time this year before I wander off into the unknown. The one person whom I have given right to scold me when I am being a jerk or a doofus. The one who knows me in both my sweetest and gloomiest of moods.

I wish I could say to her "Hey, I'm good! :) All's fine so ... how do I make your life miserable today :)"

Yeah, that's how we used to make each other's day. Like cats and dogs snarling and hissing at each other just for the fun of it.

But the most important role she had in my life was to tell me what I couldn't understand on my own. When I make decisions, it is almost always considering a lot of things. She on the other hand, thinks in black and white. I've learned that from her :)

It was never hard for her to make life simpler. And because of that, she's the one I turn to whenever I have headaches about dating and relationships. She helped me understand just why some of them are indecisive (she claims she's the exception, bwahaha) and why I'm letting myself become a willing victim. Yet in a way, she never told me to change anything.

I guess if she was around right now, she would've kicked my nuts anyway XD

After receiving that mail, I felt a little prick of pain in my chest. I know it cannot happen anymore.