After being a Guild Wars whore for a long time even some of my guildmates eventually leaving, I myself have not played it for a month, I am getting my fancies up for RF Online.

I will admit, I had myself become biased because I read another reviewer's commentaries first: in short this MMORPG is functional but dismal for him. Now if I read things like this, what's there for me to enjoy anyway?

Well in comes the fact that I am a devourer of fiction and imagery, concepts fuel my mind whenever it is exposed to things like this, regardless what other people think. I _might_ buy this game and get my grubby hands on it, for the simple fact that I want to experience it. I have not checked Gibbity for reviews yet [will do in a few minutes].

Anyway, here's a rundown of the elements of the game.

The races are the people of:
- Accretia: think like the Borg, except with style. I like the idea of this race, inside the fashionable armor is a throbbing brain that pilots their cyborg bodies.
- Cora: Ku Klux Klan meets Victoria's Secret meets Protoss. If I do get the game I'm going for this race because it currently is underdog. And they have sexy chic models to boot.
- Bellato: intergalactic geeks -- yeap, it's an apt description. The site says they're dwarfen [note, not dwarVen] and I would've half-expected them to be pudgy and sport beards and say "Aye!". When I saw them, they were right ... they _we're_ dwarfen, meaning, midgety like a kid, not midgety like a midget.

They're roughly Starcraft's races melded with medieval swordsmen and gunners. Heck, the 'fleshy' races have pointy ears, so I guess there's no 'human' or neutrally-inclined race.

The classes aren't that broad-spectrum grade. Each race has warrior, archer, and specialist [support class] classes, with the Cora having a spiritualist as a fourth class. At level 30 you get to evolve or choose your 1st job [hurray!] and at 40 you get a second job [calloo-callay!]. Now what thought to leave you with? Okay just try to make guesses how long you'll be playing this just to get to level 25.

I've downloaded a feature video of it, and was expecting some serious battle with explosions and sexy war, but what I got was Anakin Skywalker [Bellato] getting a hard-on with an elven [Cora] broad and getting out of there on a desert racer or something while pursued by evil, er ... things [Accretia] complete with a pursuit scene in a trench [oh how Star Waresque]. This would've been all cheesy and stuff, except that the background music was FF9-esque sung by Lea Salonga or Faye Wong. And as you know, those things make me cry and feel all warm and fuzzy inside [yeah yeah, laugh all you want bozo].

So, RF Online. What to do with ye?


"So, let's do this the hard way, or the harder way -- who effing left that stinking, unsinkable log in the toilet?"