I've gotten into this thinking that the office workplace has uncanningly turned into my place of solace and not my condo lately. Ever since I've lost my childhood home, I've felt like a restless, wandering soul. The condo where I stay is simply not filling up my needs for 'stability', or that need of having something that wouldn't fall apart when everything else goes wrong.

This sadness, along with the loss of contact from the woman I hold special, and from a long time friend (you know who you are, Moon) whose weirdo, secretive behaviour is freaking me out, has given me my first episode of depression this month.

I'm still not strong enough to deal with multiple sources of negativity yet. I bet people shouldn't even be handling it alone. But that's just me.

This morning, maybe the chill of the aircon, I felt a bit more alive. If not hungry.