Sometimes I wonder, what is it with these hands of mine? I'd be proud if it's full of callouses and scars and blackened bruises because to me, those things mean I'm a hard worker and that I can endure pain. I wouldn't mind if it is ugly or hideous. So long as the muscles and sinew are intact and working it's all the same to me. When I was a kid, I would envy my father's hands because they're big and strong, and that someday, I'd like to have the same.

But when people remark that they are gentle-looking, when your date takes it and uses it to warm her cheek, when my niece does the same in gleefulness, or when an old flame would go saying she's missing my touch, I can't help but wonder, maybe there's something to it all.

Must be the laundry detergent I'm using :D

Oh, just talking about my little niece who likes to jump up on my lap and typpity-type on the keyboard. It's a mooshy thing, thinking about kids on Christmas. I wonder what I would be like if this was my own kid? Maybe she'll be noisy and screaming for attention or whatever, but all those won't go into my head. Why? Because she's my kid, my very special one.

Sometimes by looking at her clear, pure eyes, I could remember my own memories at her age (she's two by the way). If I could look on well enough and think, I might as well remember that "magic" we look for whenever Christmas arrives. Maybe it's the candies, or the gifts, or the socks that will suddenly have money in them the morning after (we put socks on Christmas trees then, lol) ... whatever a child could believe even if it is the most fantastic or impossible of ideas ... it is somehow that pure energy spent in believing is what makes up all of this "magic".

Eventually, I grew out of this Never Never Land of believing.

But when all is quiet, and the only sound left is the tap-tap of the keyboard, I send my mind off somewhere.

The place where I used to fly in the night sky ...

On the bus, lying in bed, eating dinner, and I have TONS of things I could put in this blog, and when I want to put them in here, they just disappear o_O

Maybe I should buy a PDA and a good new pair of running shoes.

One of those days -_- I think I'll make a special entry for things like these. Y'know? Just write whatever comes out of my mind.

To start, let's talk about me! Me! Me! Me AND Meeeh! (Myself and I included). I think I've gained weight since my tummy is more bulgy than usual (thought not bulgy enough to warrant a gut category) and I have not exercised in months.

My rubber shoes are missing, and I'm hesitant to buy a new one. Because I really love those shoes.

I want to play World of Warcraft. For now I'll be content with Diablo 2 -_-

I'm a bit happy today because someone special to me texted me last night :*) tee hee

Though I was hoping I could get some action this month, if you know what I mean :D

Anyway, that removed off some of the gloominess that has reared again recently. But it wouldn't last long. I must do something else.

And right now, a fanatic (though in some other respect) officemate of mine just let me copy a few AVIs of Samurai Champloo.

Which means time to go :D

Just not feeling well today. Again, idle minds are dangerous things to have.

When I have too much time to think about things I don't want, I get sick. Sick at heart and sick at spirit.

Though right now, I feel I'm coming down to something. Also reminds me about the little prick of pain on my chest -- I've always thought about it as the cause of my death someday.

Anyway, off to do something relaxing.

That is how I will be describing the days of this year's December. Why? Work load will be given January -_-

Looks like I have to liven things up myself here. Well there are events. Going to Enchanted Kingdom (bleh) this saturday. Thursday, there'll be the office batch get together in Podium and off to somewhere I guess, but they always bore me since I stick with them by virtue of history and not of endearment.

I'm thinking of picking up a few dates, if lucky. But the thought bores me as well. I mean, it's the same old routine. Somehow the fun of possibly meeting a very interesting person don't get to me anymore. Then again, I have nothing else better to do.

I just let off a chance for an animation course (my dream) in Mapua partly because I tend to attend stuff like this only if I can have someone I know to take it with me and partly because of my trip to Ilocos Sur.

The only alternative now is to take classic guitar courses. I have to fix my guitar tonight though. I just bought some wood glue.