Free of the World. Rain worshipper. Hermit. Tormented mind.
Caged spirit. Defiant and eternal enemy of Destiny and Fate. Poet. Scientist. Artist. Daydreamer.
He who laughs. Slacker. Sleeper. Romancer of wings and clouds. Fiercely independent. He who is ponderous.
Games and anime junkie. Four eyes. Caveman. Nature-lover. He who doesn't think that hard. Non-smoker.
Music-junkie. Counter of blessings. Guitar-hugger.
He who simply wants what everybody else would like to be in this world and the next -- to be happy.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
She Who Holds the Guitar
I was having random thoughts in my head, and a person popped into my mind.
I met her more than a couple of years ago, had an hour's walk talking about anything. She was an awesome woman. Intelligent, ethereally beautiful, and most of all ... she sings and plays the guitar :o
Dunno if she remembers me though. Doesn't matter ;D
All I could do was crack jokes and have my thoughts somewhere else. This is my half-happy state. There's somewhere else I want to be, but that 'where' place don't exist. So I might as well be here. In the dark. I'm not alone.
I utter a name inside my head.
Again and again. My stomach is churning from all the beer and from all the wickedness. There's somewhere else I ought to be, but that 'where' is not warm. It does not welcome me.
Did I die?
There's light behind the door with stained glasses.
~~~
Ugh. Now that gothness is out of the way. I'm here in the office typing away. Waiting for the damn FedEx agent to come by and pick up my stuff. What do I do?
Half the time I activate a very reckless persona that I immediately have to yank it back into my head. Seriously, I'd get in trouble if it comes out in an inopportune time. My personal health is at stake here.
Incidentally I realized that after almost having a fist fight with a six footer dude. Misplaced male bravado.
~~~
In other news, I need some exercise. Shit. My tummy is bulging with fats. Even though it delights my mom that I get some cheeks, it doesn't for me. Said state makes me feel slow and clumsy.
~~~
Mmmm rainy.
Love the rain. Makes me want to sling mud balls with reckless abandon.
I think these are the times I still want to be dead drunk.
Anything to abort a mental routine that starts up in my brain whenever I couldn't release it the right way. It's analogous to a worm in your PC, I have this program in my head that executes if I'm not preoccupied enough.
What it does is put me into a self-destructive state. I've tried diagnosing it once before, but I'm not shrink. So behold, emo-ness incarnate!
Sometimes I wonder why I keep on going even though the things my heart desires most never comes to pass. Maybe I'm hopeful. Maybe I am stubborn. Maybe all I know is to endure. Maybe I just want to see what the end is like *shrugs* I wish I could always be that happy go lucky
You know the feeling of being too old for something that's bad for you? Like you know, puffing your first cigarette when you're like 50? Yeah, that feeling.
I'm enduring one now for the past months. Thinking of a way to divert this dull energy into something useful. All the cooking and baking stuff was one. But I need something fresh.
After coming out of a strip joint *cough* dota *cough*, me and some officemates decided to explore the sorroundings. It was surreal. First time we saw San Mig Ave in a different light ... with tons of strange people, both foreigners and uru-khais alike
Afterwards, well a beer or two is always a good thing. Imma social drunkard. I mean drinker. We called it a night at 4:00 AM o_O
After some bottles I could just hear this little green guy say cryptic phrases to me about not letting myself go to side B. Or was it dark side? I guess I'll never know while having alcohol running thru my veins ...
One afternoon of grocery strolling and I chanced upon the veggie section. Leisurely peering through each green leafy vegetable, I came upon the humble malunggay. I've heard about it since I was a kid, but for the bloody life of me, I couldn't recall anyone cooking them for any dish.
Curious, I took a sealed pack and figure out how to use it later. This happened:
Really. I feel like a koala.
I have no friggin idea how to use it. It looked like tree leaves instead of the usual fleshy veggie like pechays and kangkongs. It's just ... foliage. Not to be distracted, I used it on corn-asparagus soup, and a couple of days later, on scallop adobo (yeah, I ran out of chicken).
What puzzles me is that it doesn't have any distinctive flavor or some proper culinary adjective that aptly describes it so how come it reached the tables of the home cooking Pinoys? I mean I could just pluck a bunch of leaves from any tree stick a recipe at it and call it a dish. This just doesn't reach me.